I've just finished building Rome with my kid's Lego.
Took me a day.Submitted by: giorgiss
My new doctor is a very attractive busty blonde.
I have now given up eating apples.Submitted by: giorgiss
They say, "Crime doesn't pay."
Well, I work in Cash Converters and apparently it does.Submitted by: giorgiss
1. There's more than one way to skin a cat.
2. A cat has nine lives.
During an experiment to find out if number 1 is true, I proved that number 2 is false.Submitted by: giorgiss
They say what you don't know, can't hurt you.
Not so true when it comes to bomb defusal.Submitted by: giorgiss
I've discovered a new compound that needs to be added to the periodic table.
Its made up of B, O and O.
Its the element of surprise.Submitted by: giorgiss
Saying "whoever smelt it dealt it" doesn't work when it comes to airport sniffer dogs, apparently.
Submitted by: giorgiss
They say: "Time heals all wounds."
Doesn't help amputees much though.Submitted by: giorgiss
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep;
if I die before I wake
will someone please delete my internet browser history.Submitted by: giorgiss
Give a man a fish, and he'll feed himself for a day. Beat him to death with his own shoe, and he won't be hungry anymore.
Submitted by: giorgiss