Sky called me today and asked for some customer feedback...
...so I squealed down the phone at them.Submitted by: giorgiss
You know you're unpopular when 118 ignore your texts.
Submitted by: giorgiss
My mate came up to me the other day and asked, "How's it going?"
"Same old, same old," I replied. "Yourself?" I added.
"Can't complain," he said.
Blokes: Saying nothing in particular since the dawn of time.Submitted by: giorgiss
When asked "What would be your dream job once leaving school?" in a recent poll, 99% of 11-16 year olds wrote:
"My dreem is too wurk in a sweat shop!"
Say what you like about the kids of today, they may be illiterate but they aren't scared of hard work!Submitted by: giorgiss
My wife left the computer for a few seconds and came back in accusing me of tampering with her emails!
I quickly changed the subject.Submitted by: giorgiss
A friend of mine said she was going to spend the day "Just lolling around the house"
I couldn't see what she found so funny.Submitted by: giorgiss
Whoever invented iPhone spell checker is a complete and utter tear.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I was in my hotel room and couldn't get a signal on my mobile, so I went down to the lobby.
They've got reception there.Submitted by: giorgiss
All my mates keep laughing at me because i'm on a Pay-As-You-Go mobile phone.
So i took out a contract.........And got them killed.Submitted by: giorgiss
So I'm in JFK airport with my 3 kids Alex, Kyle and Ida. They all go missing whilst going security and I start to panic.
So I ask if I can use the tannoy to call out for them....
very innocently I shout out "AL-KY-IDA"
I dont remember much of what happened next....Submitted by: giorgiss
