It's sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his violence, and not for his brilliantly realistic paintings of tunnels.
Submitted by: giorgiss
If I had a pound for every time someone called me stupid, I'd have 2.50
Submitted by: giorgiss
I dig, you dig, we dig, he digs, she digs, they dig.
It's not a beautiful poem, but it's very deep.Submitted by: giorgiss
A policeman knocked on my door this morning, but I just locked it and sat there in complete silence.
After 20 seconds he knocked again, but I just continued to ignore it.
The knocks got louder and more frequent but I was determined not to move in the hope that he would just go away.
Then he decided to look through the window.
He shouted, "Do you think I'm stupid? I can see you in there, sir. Open the door."
I said, "You're not coming in mate!"
He said, "I don't want to come in, I just want you to step out of the car."Submitted by: giorgiss
I was walking down the street the other day and I saw these two blind blokes squaring up to fight. I shouted "My money's on the one with the knife."
You should have seen how fast they both ran off.Submitted by: giorgiss
I don't know why I just bought some new coconut shampoo...
I haven't even got any coconuts.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was in an English exam and they asked "Write the past tense of 'Think'"
I thought and thought about this for ages.
Eventually, I went for 'Thunk'Submitted by: giorgiss
Sky News: "Emergency services were afraid they could be swamped by a torrent of melted ice."
I believe the technical term is "water".Submitted by: giorgiss
The other day I was reading my emails and there was one from my boss, it said;
"Mr. Morgan I regret to inform you that although I thought this company could tolerate your ADD, I'm afraid you're just not productive enough. You may turn up Wednesday to collect your things. I sincerely hope you will be OK."
And I thought to myself, doesn't OK look like a sideways person?Submitted by: giorgiss
"Gud luk 2 evry1 gettin ther resultz 2moro"
Thank you - I can tell you your English result already if you want.Submitted by: giorgiss
