"When I was your age, Apple and Blackberry were fruits, not phones!".
Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't they still fruits?Submitted by: giorgiss
I was out shopping when a young lad stopped me and said, "Excuse me, mate, if I give you some money, will you go into the shop and buy some beer?"
I said, "Wow, thanks very much. That's very generous of you."Submitted by: giorgiss
I feel so smug tonight. I didn't put my clock forward in March.
Submitted by: giorgiss
My boss called me into his office today.
He said, "I've heard a little rumour that you are going to be sick for the next two weeks just so you can go on your mate's stag do in Vegas."
I said, "That's correct."
He said, "Well, in that case I have no choice but to let you go."
I said, "Cheers mate, I appreciate that."Submitted by: giorgiss
A man was in front of a judge. The judge says to him, "You've been brought here for drinking."
The man says, "Okay, let's get started."Submitted by: giorgiss
Microsoft recently announced that they're releasing Windows 7 in Europe without an internet browser and users will have to download and install one for themselves.
Anyone else see a key flaw with this?Submitted by: giorgiss
Save money on a bigger TV by simply moving the couch closer to your existing one.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Legitimate CD sales are killing piracy.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I was pulled over by the police today.
"How fast do you think you were going, sir?"
"60mph?" I asked.
"Try 135," the officer replied.
So I shut the door and drove as fast as I could.Submitted by: giorgiss
My Grandad never talks about his time fighting in WWII.
He was shot by a German sniper in 1943 and died instantly.Submitted by: giorgiss
